Tough Love’s Steve Ward: “Are You Dating or ‘Hanging Out’ “?
Exclusive interview! VH1’s master matchmaker explains how to save a date and more.
In person, Steve Ward, the host of VH1’s Tough Love Miami isn’t as loud, combative or abrasive as his TV persona. Then again, if I had to deal with those wacky women on his show, I don’t think I could last an episode. Away from the set, he’s thoughtful, funny, cute as a button, and yes, you guessed it, chock full of dating wisdom. During a recent VH1 Tough Love Miami Twitter party, I stole him away to get some dating advice to share with all the singletons we know.
Of course the first question asked was which celeb he would love to play matchmaker to. Steve replied, “JLo. Because I think she’s fresh on the scene, on top of the world, drop dead gorgeous, intelligent, successful, single mom.” Sounds like a typical client for Master Matchmakers, his firm.
Steve explains, “Most of the women that contact us are in their mid to late 30s, early 40s. They’re serious about meeting somebody that they could end up spending the rest of their life with. They’re tired of playing games and dating the wrong men, all of them have a lot to offer. They’re beautiful. They’re intelligent. They’re successful, and they don’t have time to waste on the wrong people. Pretty much sums up JLo to a T.”
I then asked about the horror that we’ve all gone through: the bad date. Some of us cut and run, some of us grit our teeth and just try to get through the night without harming our date. When asked if a woman should just tell the guy, “thanks but no thanks,” and leave, Steve replied,” I wouldn’t go so far as to say ‘thank you so much’ and just get up and leave. I would have a conversation about the fact that it’s not really going well. And I would just sit there and say, ‘You know I got to be honest, I don’t really think that this date is going that well. I think we could probably both save each other a lot of time by ending it here and go our separate ways, what do you think?’”
Kinda refreshing yet scary to hear. That step would probably better than carrying low-heeled shoes in case you have to make a quick getaway.
Other insights from Steve:
• One first dates: “Remember it’s just a date. It’s not a job interview, it’s not an election it’s not a competition. It’s just a date, dating is supposed to be fun.”
• “Hanging out” consists of going to his place, going to a movie, going for a walk — basically biding time until he gets into your pants.
• Dating, on the other hand, is lot more respectful. “You take them somewhere nice; you talk about what they want to talk about.”
• A guy isn’t going to waste his time putting his best foot forward if he just wants to have sex.
• The biggest indicator that someone is taking you seriously is that they’re making time to spend with you.
• Ask if the guy wants to date or be friends
Want to get more tips from Steve? Watch the video!
PJ Gach is Senior Editor: Style + Beauty at BettyConfidential.