SOS! Spring Short Shorts Alert!
Don’t panic, but spring and shorts are just around the corner!
Yes, ladies! It’s that time of year again. Although winter is in high gear, you’re all very aware somewhere in the back of your subconscious that spring is just seconds away. As your Cyber main Gay, it’s my yearly duty to point out to you that the warm weather will be here soon enough and it will be time for swim suits… and yes, girls…. this year’s biggest trend… Short Shorts. Before you down a whole bag of Oreos from the stress of it all, I’m here to give you hope. You can do this. I’ll tackle swim suits in another column to avoid any fashion nervous break downs.
First of all, they’re re not necessarily your MAMA’S DAISY DUKES! These new modern short shors come in variety of lengths, fabrics, textures, solids and prints so that you can participate in this trend. Be confident! Legs definitely are the feature focus so if you got them, flaunt them. If you have leg issues like varicose veins, the dreaded cellulite, or super skinny legs, then you’re in good company. Most women have some issue in this area. A fresh waxing plus some self tanning cream instantly gives your legs a lift. You can do squats at the gym and hide veins with waterproof leg makeup like Dermablend as well. It’s up to you!
As far as Harvey’s Short Shorts Rules, I only have three:
1. If your ass is hanging out, they’re too short. That is, unless you’re in private with your significant other doing some fabulous moves on your newly installed stripper pole that Santa brought you for Christmas. Otherwise don’t wear them.
2. Short Shorts with pleats never work. They always make you look heavier and hippier or like the girl on the golf course that we can never understand. Is she or isn’t she? So I don’t care if manufacturers offer these pleated nightmares in a store near you! Back away from the pleated shorts!
3. Shoes with Short Shorts. Flats for day, wedge or heel for night. This always assures you that they can be appropriate. The only places this rule does not apply are in Miami and Los Angeles. You girls always do what you want any way!
Here’s my early pick of short short cuteness from J Crew! For girls on a budget, keep your eye’s on Target! Next week I’ll be tackling the swim suit fun we’re getting ready to have.
J. Crew gingham short ($54.50, jcrew.com)
Mossimo for Target denim short shorts ($17.99) available February 5, 2012 at Target stores nationwide and online.
Put that Oreo down immediately and go wax!
Harvey Helms is a beauty culturist and writer, drawing on 30 years of experience in cosmetics,fashion and design. Harvey has held positions ranging from Global Director of Beauty for Revlon Cosmetics to Executive Director of Special Events for Donna Karan Beauty. Harvey currently lives and works in Silicon Valley, where he just finished writing his first book in a trilogy of three: an engaging tell-all on the fashion industry. Follow Harvey on Twitter.com/HarveyHelms.