Single For The Holidays
Just because you went through a tough breakup and are not part of a couple, doesn’t mean you can’t have fun at holiday time.
Skating sweethearts. Couples cuddling over cocoa. Ad after ad about the perfect gift for your significant other. The holidays can be an emotional minefield for the suddenly single.
“All the imagery we see during this time of year involves families and couples,” says Jamie Beckman, author of The Frisky 30-Day Breakup Guide: One Month of Manicures, Massages, and Mojitos to Help You Forget About Him. “So if your relationship breaks down it can be hard to feel a sense of belonging, especially if your family lives far away. Not to mention that when you gather with people for Thanksgiving, Christmas or Hanukkah, it’s hard not to be hyper aware of all the couples and feel you’re missing a partner.”
So what’s a gal to do for some holiday cheer?
Beckman suggests that instead of fretting festivities or holing up at home, you partake of all winter has to offer with your best pals.
“You can still create happy holiday memories,” says Beckman. “Exchange homemade gifts with your best friend, bake cookies with your sister, buy a Christmas tree with your roommate, bring your craziest girlfriend to a Matzo Ball singles party, or just make a mix of holiday tunes—I recommend the Muppets and John Denver singing the ‘12 Days of Christmas.’”
One thing not to do? Call your ex after too many cups of eggnog.
“If the relationship was unhealthy, don’t use your seasonal loneliness as an excuse to contact your ex,” says Rhonda Findling, author of Don’t Call that Man. “Don’t even send a card or small gift. Initiating contact gives that person another chance to reject you, and that certainly won’t help your mood. And beyond that think about the reasons you broke up in the first place; chances are the person probably hasn’t changed.”
And what if your ex is the one doing the post-party drunk dialing?
Read on for Rhonda’s advice…