Oral Sex 101: Learning How to Receive
Learn to love your man loving you!
So, you think you know all there is to know about oral? Think again. So many women assume that being good at oral sex means knowing how to please your partner. Learning all those fancy little moves you read about in women’s magazines are supposed to make you an oral sex aficionado. Your partner always seems pleased with the outcome (no pun intended), but does oral sex ever leave you wanting more? Sure, you can give it out, but can you take it?
Most women that I have talked to about oral sex say the same thing. They would rather give than receive. Many woman that I have spoken with feel as though they are unattractive “down there” or that they smell funny, taste funny, or look strange to their lover.
“I don’t understand why a guy would want to go down there. It grosses me out. I am uncomfortable with any guy getting that close,” says Lucia, 21.
“I can’t come from oral sex. I think oral sex is way too intimate and makes me feel vulnerable. My boyfriend begs me to let him go down on me, but…I just can’t do it,” explains Karen, 19.
What is worrisome about these comments that young women are making, is that they seem to believe that their vaginas are unattractive, that oral sex is too intimate (and therefore intimacy is bad) and that letting a man perform oral sex on them will make them feel too vulnerable (which is also seen as a negative.)
Feeling vulnerable and being intimate should be what the sexual experience is truly about. When two people come together in a sexual way, there is a bond, there is a connection, there is an energy that unites us on a baser level. Seems as though many of us are trying to avoid that kind of connection, in lieu of a more superficial relationship. Are we that afraid to get close to one another?