Mean Betty on TLC Forcing Kate Gosselin to Get a Real Job
Poor Kate, she’s no longer a “star.”
Kittens, this morning when Meanie heard the news, she literally jumped for joy! (Note to self, it’s not a good idea to jump and accidentally toss rum punch on a white rug. The butler was not very happy with Meanie.) My little lambkins, Meanie was uber athletic this morning because she heard the most wondrous news! As she was reading People, she stumbled upon this: “TLC has decided not to renew another season of Kate Plus 8. By the end of this season Kate Plus 8 will have hit the 150 episode mark (including Jon & Kate Plus 8); an exceptional milestone. TLC hopes to check in with Kate and the family periodically with specials in the future.”
Hallelujah kittens! Meanie is impressed that TLC finally found their adult pants and said no more to the star-crazed mom. Just think of all those cameramen’s legs who will be saved from future injury! They’ll no longer have to wear heavy duty shin pads for fear of Kate’s monsters kids kicking them.
Meanie does feel a tad sorry for Kate. Kate will no longer be able to get free products, clothing and other sundries from companies hoping that she’ll be spotted using them. The poor thing will no longer be able to troll various award shows or the Today Show looking for husbands number two and three. Kittens, in case you’ve forgotten, when Kate appeared on The Today Show on August 8th, she mentioned more than once that she was looking for a new husband victem.
Isn’t it so sad that Kate will no longer be able to use TV shows for her mating calls? One wonders how she’ll get her next date? Match.com, eHarmony, Mail Order Husbands? The mind boggles. Once Kate used her bodyguard to chase after a guy she thought was cute in DC. Without her own show, will she no longer have a bodyguard to grab her next victim?
Kittens, Meanie does wonder how Kate will handle breaking a nail when working. Whoa! Can you visually imagine Kate in a normal office environment? Can you see her sitting at a desk? Would she tie her kids to the legs of her chair to keep them in line during office hours? Oh heavens, Meanie needs a cocktail now, that visual is terrifying.
But kittens, really did you think that Kate would actually work for a living? No, she’s planning on going on “speaking tours.” Speaking about what, we’re not sure, but we do know that the idea of being trapped in a room with a blond barracuda who thinks TV and freebies are her life is enough to make Meanie quake. And Meanie doesn’t quake easily.
Still it’s nice to know that Kate is an optimist. She told her followers on Twitter that she was looking forward to writing more books, and “other fun work opportunities that may come my way.”
Meanie would love to see Kate in a McDonald’s uniform. Wouldn’t you?