Mean Betty on Mitchel Musso and Other Disney Stars with DUIs

Mean Betty wonders why it is that so many Disney stars have been slapped with DUIs lately...

Mean Betty on Mitchel Musso and Other Disney Stars with DUIs

Mean Betty wonders why it is that so many Disney stars have been slapped with DUIs lately…

-Mean Betty

Mitchel Musso

Kittens, Meanie would like to draw your attention to a disturbing trend she’s been noticing of late. That trend involves the tendency of former Disney stars to get slapped with exceedingly unglamorous DUI charges. To which Meanie says: What on EARTH is the matter with today’s youth?

The latest wee ones to join this unfortunate craze are Mitchel Musso, formerly of Hannah Montana, and Orlando Brown, who made his name on That’s So Raven. Mr. Musso found himself getting friendly with the good gentlemen of Burbank, California’s local law enforcement brigade just last week after he failed to slow down for police directing traffic—after which said gentlemen discovered that the actor’s blood-alcohol level was higher than .08, the legal limit in the United States. Furthermore, Mr. Musso is only 20 years old. As such, he could be facing six months in jail and a $1,000 fine if convicted. Whoops. Mr. Brown, on the other hand, was 23 years old at the time of his tangle with the police in August (he got pulled over for not having a license plate on his car); however, his blood-alcohol level was also over twice the legal limit. He’s just struck a plea deal wherein he’ll be on probation for 36 months, will pay a $390 fine, will spend one day in jail, and will both complete an alcohol education program and attend 10 AA meetings, but still. Double whoops.

Now, Meanie loves her cocktails, but she certainly doesn’t love driving after she’s had them (that’s what the chauffeur is for). Why? Because Meanie realizes that she isn’t invincible. If the threat to her safety isn’t enough to keep her away from her beloved Rolls Royce after a martini or two, all Meanie has to do is think about what might happen should she run into the wrong person—and since that would involve saying goodbye to the Rolls, to the mansion, to the butler, and all of her other necessary creature comforts, Meanie is content to let the chauffeur do his job. It is what he’s paid for, after all.

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Bearing all this in mind, then, why is it that so many young stars—especially those of the Disney variety—seem to think that they are invincible? Contrary to popular belief, simply being a star is not enough to put one out of reach of the law. Furthermore, Meanie just can’t get over how silly these young ‘uns are being. Why, oh, why would you want to jeopardize your very livelihood by behaving in such ways? They can only lead to trouble!

Of course, Mr. Musso and Mr. Brown are far from the only Disney stars to fall prey to this questionable trend. Meanie firmly believes that it all began with the infamous Miss Lindsay Lohan, who has proven herself to be the prototype of the Disney star gone wrong. Do you recall, kittens, how adorable and fresh-faced little Lindsay was in The Parent Trap? Or how charming she was opposite the dynamite Jamie Lee Curtis in Freaky Friday? Once Lindsay started to go downhill, though, she rolled along at such a breakneck pace that nothing could stop her, and, well… we all know where that ended up. And with that poor unfortunate soul as the prime example, it now seems that a shocking number of later Disney stars are simply following in her staggering, intoxicated footsteps.

Meanie knows that child stars have been misbehaving for as long as they have existed as the bizarre cultural construct that they are; but still. Is there a way to halt this trend in his booze-fueled tracks? Especially when it comes to Disney? Because, really, would everyone be so much happier if there were less ridiculous DUIs in the world?

Besides, Mickey Mouse doesn’t approve of drinking and driving. And you wouldn’t want to see Mickey when he’s angry. Trust Meanie. She knows.



Mean Betty

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