I Was A Brazilian Wax Virgin
Oh the pain, the pain! Was the wax worth it?
-PJ Gach
I remember years ago watching Sex and the City, when Carrie went to LA for her book tour and got her first Brazilian. She didn’t call it that; she implied that she was “bare down there.” I didn’t pay much attention, but my girlfriends did, and as fast as you can pull a cloth strip from your skin, everyone was doing it.
Everyone but me. I had been sticking with the basic bikini wax. That is, when I remembered and had time. Truthfully, the only time I even bothered was when I was dating. No one complained that I wasn’t bald, so I didn’t bother.
What made me change my mind and decide to do it? Curiosity, plain and simple. I wanted to see what the fuss was all about. A Brazilian, if you don’t know, is when they take off everything “down there.” Yes, we’re talking waxing your labia majora and the skin between your butt cheeks.
I made an appointment for my first Brazilian at Completely Bare, in New York City, a salon with a celebrity clientele and a reputation for giving one of the best Brazilian treatments ever. They even do vajazzling- and no, I’m not ever going to do that.
Read Should You Vajazzle Your Vajayjay?
Completely Bare has four locations, and I went to their downtown spot on lower Fifth Avenue. As I got closer and closer to the salon, two things happened: My heart started to race uncontrollably and my legs temporarily stopped moving. Luckily, the salon has a soothing lounge area that’s decorated in white with pink and purple M+Ms in large bowls. (Personally, I think that wherever you go, there should be large vats of free M+Ms. Just a thought.)
My technician, Rebecca, a slim, friendly woman with long brown hair, introduced herself and showed me to the treatment room. The treatment room was long and narrow; about the size of a nice walk-in closet. It too, was decorated in white. There was a long narrow bed — the type you see in salons across the country, luxe and not. She told me to get take everything off below the waist, “Really? Everything?” I exclaimed. She nodded and smiled.
Before she left, she told me that there were wipies that I could use to make sure that I was completely clean. She walked out, and I stared at the wipies lying smack dab in the middle of the bed. What the hell have I gotten myself into?
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LOL! This is hilarious. And this is one of those life experiences I just might have to miss out on…
I love my Brazilian wax- she’s being silly!
Kathy Griffin just got one on TV and she was screaming. I wonder if PJ screamed like Kathy or if it was worse?? She did mentioned that she went temporarily blind.
Brazilian is the only way to go.
She went to the right place- Completely Bare is amazing. They’re so friendly there.
@Yay heels… who loves a Brazilian wax? Really?!? These are the most painful thing ever invented! Ever! Clearly by a man no doubt
But I have to agree with PJ cause it does make you feel sexier. I just wish it didn’t hurt so darn much!!! For the West Coast gals, Pink Cheeks is the best with a big celeb cliental also 
Thanks for the funny article… you made me laugh recounting my own experience with the waxer!
ROTFLMAO! Great story PJ!
Haha this is really funny!
I did the brazilian once. i decided the regular bikini wax works just fine and with less embarrassment.
This is just not worth it! Kudos to you for going through it, PJ, but they couldn’t pay me to have it done…Well, maybe if they paid me $1,000 or so lol.
ive never been waxed so i wouldent know but i dont know if i want all that pain
This was funny! Now I know that Brazilian is not the way to go for me! Too much pain!
Funny story! Ouch, I would never do that!
No way! I don’t care who likes it, going thru that pain is not worth it. I think sexy is a state of mind, and I can’t imagine that going thru that would change how I feel about myself.
I have never had a wax job of any kind. I still don’t know if thats good or bad!! LOL I think I would go through the pain if it lasted long enough, but at age 46 & married 27 years I think I will just stick to my normal.
I think Laser…..it’s permanent…well sort of….
I, personally, like grass on the playground. And shouldn’t a pussy have fur?
I’ve never had a Brazilian Wax either, but I am now looking into some local salons for my “first time.” I am tired of shaving so perhaps it’s time to join the rest of the world.
Thanks for the information on what it’s really like.
This is a great story… good for her for powering through it! Waxing can be a helluva ordeal, but I think it’s definitely worth it! If you’d like, check out my article on TOOTIT.com on waxing and other hair removal options: http://tootit.com/2011/10/for-your-vagina-when-shaving-isnt-cutting-it/
Thanks!