Excuses To Get Out Of A Date

Prison break: the art of the escape on a first date.
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Bad FIrst Date

For the past 7 days I’ve been digitally flirting with a 28-year-old guy from England. He has the sexiest accent and a rascally wit that is incredibly charming. And probably trouble.

So after a handful of online and telephone conversations, we’ve decided to meet this Friday for a movie. And now I’m getting the first-date butterflies, because it’s not really so much of a first date as it is a general inspection. Make sure we’re both who we claimed to be on our dating profiles.

Is he really 5’10”? Does he really have an athletic build? Would he really act like a gentleman?

Trust me, 99 percent of the time, the actual person is significantly different than the profile person. The photo might be a year or two old, he might give himself a few inches in the height department, or his self-description may be the most personality he ever radiates. And that’s only because his best friend with the sense of humor wrote it. However, there are occasions when he’s much cuter than his photo, or has much more energy in person. The profile is never completely accurate; you just hope it’s a positive difference. Either way it’s a gamble.

Read Blind Date: A Real Guy’s Strange, Hilarious Story

Because of this, there’s always tension until you know you’re both interested. Which happens within 6 seconds of meeting each other. If you smile at each other, he puts his hand on your back and guides you to the theatre box office and you feel tingles and maybe a little dizzy with excitement, then it’s all-systems-go and you can just enjoy the company of an attractive man. However, what do you do if you get there, see him and your excitement drops like a wilted flower on a hot summer day? Or, what if his face goes from Christmas morning to the vasectomy operating table?

Unfortunately, there is no dating ripcord that you can yank in an emergency situation, so there are really only a few ways to get out spending the next two hours, or even two minutes, with this unappealing stranger.

If you’re extremely bold, you can always drop the direct bail and just say, “This isn’t going to work” and walk out. You’ll save your time and his.

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8 thoughts on “Excuses To Get Out Of A Date

  1. I agree — there's no great way to break a bad date. Unless he's being really offensive, just stick it out — and don't make a plan for a long dinner on the first date! You must build your exit strategy into your initial plan!

  2. You should know within the first ten minutes if he's a keeper or not. If he's a jerk, order something that won't take long to cook or eat, and then get the heck outa there!

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