Am I the ONLY Wife Who Hates Telling My Husband What to Do?
I hate being The Shrew … but how did he manage to survive life before he met me?
– Melissa Chapman, marriedmysugardaddy.com
I didn’t meet my husband until he was at the ripe old age of 38. Up until that point he had “SOMEHOW” managed (without my incessant prodding, reminding and NAGGING) to secure a job, an apartment and get even get dressed every morning. And yet after 12 years of marriage, this once COMPLETELY self-sufficient individual (did I mention he went through medical school, internship, residency and fellowship without a mere nudge from anyone) truly needs to wait for me to remind him what to do. And … I HATE IT!
I abhor being perceived (especially when in earshot of my kids) as “The Shrew” — the bad cop — the one who is always barking out my Honey-Do list and why the hell do I even need to draft up a Honey-Do list in the first place? Clearly this guy was able to successfully navigate life pre marriage and kids, so why do I always need to be the voice in his ear reminding him of the stuff that needs to get done?
My thoughts … if I just let fly — NOTHING would happen, and I really mean absolutely nothing. The leak that is threatening to cave in our roof would do just that; the roof would cave in.
But maybe that’s the best possible way to handle things so as not to appear shrewish in the eyes of onlookers, aka my kids. Although we live in the same house and I suspect experience the same surroundings, for some strange reason, my husband rarely picks up on stuff that needs to be done. (I know — he’s a smart guy working a seamless clueless cover.) Perhaps if I let said roof cave in, and teach my husband a lesson, next time he sees a leak in the roof he just might of his own volition use his trusty index finger to CALL a roofer. The only issue on my part I that I really don’t want to sit in a pool of water…
Are you too the shrew to your husband’s innocent “I’m just standing here I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing unless someone hands me a Honey-Do list” counterpart?
Melissa Chapman blogs about her marriage and everything in between at http://www.marriedmysugardaddy.com/. Her work has appeared in The Staten Island Advance, Care.com, ABC News, BlogHer, Baby Center, Momtourage, Lifetime Moms, Babble, The Washington Post, Time Out NY Kids and iVillage.