Why I Sleep With Your Husband

Mistresses confess why they do it, how they do it and more
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True Confessions

Why I Sleep With Your Husband

Mistresses confess why they do it, how they do it and more

-Julie Ryan Evans

A woman flirting with her boss

From Jenny Sanford to Elizabeth Edwards to Jennifer Aniston, women scorned are in the headlines regularly. It’s for them that we ache and empathize; we become outraged on their behalf and at the men they once considered their “better” halves.

But behind every one of these marital meanderings that happen every day in every city is a mistress, and it’s about them we wonder – how could they?

So we asked them, and they very candidly told us.

Managing Life as a Mistress

Trisha*, 35, is having an affair with a married man with whom she works. It’s been going on for a little more than a year now. She no longer wears her favorite perfume, and she dyes her hair in a shade similar to that of her lover’s wife so that telltale hairs won’t be so telling.

“There will be no trace of me on his person,” she says.

They go to great and creative lengths to make sure their communications aren’t discovered – no text messages, no IM conversations, no credit cards. They use a blogging platform to transmit messages to one another – the same platform both for their personal blogs, so as not to arise suspicion, should his wife see him on the site. They never publish the posts, just save them as drafts for the other one to delete as soon as he or she reads.

What makes her want a “taken” man so badly to perform such an orchestrated affair?

“I love being the mistress,” says Trisha. “It grants me all the benefits of a relationship, a confidant and sexual partner, without bogging my own growth with the more mundane aspects of a relationship or taking up an excessive amount of time.”

As for the man’s wife, Trisha feels she’s actually helping her.

“I respect his wife and what they have together,” Trisha explains. “I see my affair with her husband as a sort of service. She is no longer responsible for his sexual pleasure. As a result of having found a suitable outlet, he is better able to focus on his duties and responsibilities as her mate.”

But will he leave his wife her? Isn’t that what all mistresses really want?

“I hope he doesn’t leave her for me,” she says. “That would be absurd. Affairs should never become monogamous relationships. How can you ever trust someone who has so clearly demonstrated such a lack of conscience, such a talent with lying and stealing? It’s not a trick question: you can’t. A foundation of lies – even if they belong to both of you – is no foundation at all.”


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0 thoughts on “Why I Sleep With Your Husband

  1. Agreed! They think they’re helping the wives out?? Maybe the husband is in a better mood at home but it’s all lies! I don’t call cheating with my husband helpful at all.

  2. Wow. This is fascinating … and scary! What is wrong with those first two women? The first one thinks she’s “empowering” herself? What a pathetic joke.

  3. seriously…she is trying to come up with every excuse to make this pathetic relationship “okay”. and you know what? it will never be okay, or right, or beneficial. it’s only about fucking. pure and simple. the husband should make better friends with his hand than this skank.

  4. When I was single I had a clear conscious about sleeping with a married man once, for the thrill of it, but I could never have a full-blow affair. Knowing that I was part of such deceit would kill my conscious. Now that I’m married I think I would feel the same about the situation if I was single again but I would never cheat on my bf, that’s what relationships are all about! I’m sorry but if you’re not satisfied and to the point where you are actually making the decision to sleep with someone and lie to your spouse, I don’t care why you THINK you should stay, you don’t deserve to! People need to be extremely honest with themselves when making a commitment to someone. If their partner is incapable of fulfilling their real needs, not just fleeting or superficial needs, then don’t enter a commitment or break the one you’re in.

  5. I say to each is on. Im a mistress also. My relationship has its ups and downs just like any other relationship. As long as you are happy, who cares what everyone else thinks. Most of them arent happy themselves.

  6. I’ve been a wife who was cheated on. (Yes, I threw him to the curb) I’ve also been a mistress. Believe me, the mistress is treated far better. They get all the benefits and don’t have to wash their dirty laundry. I can honestly say that I have never met a man who did not cheat on his wife, or would if he had the opportunity.
    Yes, sometimes it’s about sex – but sometimes you make a great connection and it becomes a real relationship. If the relationship sours, you can end it if you want to and you don’t have to share your life savings to do it. Husbands and wives grow in different directions sometimes and stay together for kids, finances, feelings of obligation, etc. I don’t ever want a man to stay with me because he feels obligated to do so; yes, it feel good that someone would risk so much to be with you, values your time and actually wants to be with you.
    What men seem to forget is that for every so-called ‘unfulfilled’ husband, there’s also an unfulfilled wife. Those same guys would NEVER suspect the Mrs. of having the same intimacy needs as they have. Men have always had the “It’s all about Me” mentality.

  7. I sleep with your husband because you don’t take care of him. I listen to him because you don’t. I’ve held him when he’s cried. If he could afford a divorce and child support you’d be out on your butt and I’m NOT delusional.

  8. don’t take this wrongly jaz64.. but i have some questions for you..

    what about your pride?
    your personal worth?
    value? self respect?

    why should he have you to take care of him?
    why should you be the one to listen?
    why should you be the to dry he’s tears?

    didn’t he marry her for those reasons?

    why should you be the one to clean up and pick up the pieces?

    hows that fair to you? is it worth it?
    the securities of now..? how about in a few years time..? when you too have become another bickering women to his ears? what then? and when he finds himself a new toy..
    what becomes of you? you do know you’re just an escape from reality right? the fantasy.. but once the fantasy is gone.. what happens to you?

    lastly.. have you no decency left?
    do you really have to make the cookie crumble? just for your sake of happiness?

    i just want to know these things to really understand..

  9. There is never a good reason tp cheat. Instead of being with you he should be home talking to his wife about how he feels. He should be trying to make his marriage work.
    My Husband cheated on me and I did nothing but love him. I told him I wanted him, needed more sex , needed him. He cheated anyway. I left. If he’s not happy with his wife he should divorce her.
    They can work out the legal stuff when the time comes. Not seeking divorce is just a cop-out on his part. I divorced my husband and he’s got the kids. I’M the one paying child support. There are always options to cheating if you really want to see them.

  10. First of all karma is a bi***.What goes around comes around..there is no justification for knowingly sleeping with a married man.Any woman who does obviously does not know her worth or is a selfish, low self-esteem whore who has no self-respect or pride about herself and doesn’t deserve any respect whatsoever. Men love to have their cake and eat it too which is why most of them should never get married.Just remember every dog has his/her day when scores will settle themselves and the wives will emerge victoriously!!

  11. every story has 2 sides from the oth girls point of view:
    i was invloved with an engaged guy we worked in the same office and he was there for me during my abusive relationship with my ex so as we saw each other everyday we grew closer.i do not know how we crossed the line from co workers to getting physical but i was vulnerable now looking back i think he just took advantage of the fact i was really emotionally unstable n a complete wreck

    so sometimes it is the guy’s fault too =(

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