Online Dating: Tales from the Front Lines
Love's greatest cynic gambles her heart online


Updated on May 18, 2011, 5:16 pm ET
By Nicole Christie    Find in Love+Sex    Related videos | articles | comments | share it

In Her Words

A frustrated womanI said I would never do it. Never would I sink so low. Never would I throw myself into the tureen of desperation bouillabaisse, lie prone on the Singles Smorgasbord, and dish myself up for a taste - all in the pedestrian hope of living happily ever after with my personal Prince Charming.

Never, never would I try online dating.

But in the four years since my divorce, I've been a drunk driver on the Singleton Highway, making wrong turns and veering off course en route to Spinsterville. Having subscribed to a supposedly infallible strategy - devised through grilling countless people about how they'd met their true love - I've dated people I met while pursuing my passions, at my job, and through trusted friends. But this has only brought me into contact with the emotionally unavailable, socially retarded, and potentially gay. (Sometimes all three.) After four consecutive head-on collisions, it dawned on me that I was embodying the definition of insanity: pursuing the same course of action over and over, and expecting different results.

So I surrendered and said "Enchanté" to eHarmony and its "29 Dimensions of Compatibility." The mission: One month. Sixty bucks. Two dates.

1 | 2  Next Page »  

Share this Article...
    

follow BettyConfidential on...


More from BettyTV...more BettyTV

Partners...

kitty
#1. kitty on 07/24/2009 - 9:19 am (EDT)
OMG -- what a creep! So funny. But don't give up yet! That's only 2 guys
hipstergal23
#2. hipstergal23 on 07/24/2009 - 10:09 am (EDT)
Haha this is so funny and I like your idea thag online dating is good for the experience but not the guy
lotsowritin25
#3. lotsowritin25 on 07/24/2009 - 12:04 pm (EDT)
there's no such thing as true love - especially not on the gosh dran internet
Femme Fatale
#4. Femme Fatale on 07/24/2009 - 4:13 pm (EDT)
I met my husband on the internet. Have been married 11 years. It can work!
LookitsCynthia
#5. LookitsCynthia on 07/27/2009 - 9:42 am (EDT)
hahahahaha, hilarious! This is why I would never online date.
Strong and Quirky
#6. Strong and Quirky on 07/27/2009 - 11:37 am (EDT)
o man, now I'm afraid to try online dating
ladycygnet
#7. ladycygnet on 07/27/2009 - 6:55 pm (EDT)
I was totally disappointed in eHarmony. At least you got two dates out of the deal--I got none! I had better luck with a free dating site--it didn't lead to happily ever after, but I did get an awesome daughter out of the deal, so I'd hesitate to call it a total wash.
ladycygnet
#8. ladycygnet on 07/27/2009 - 6:55 pm (EDT)
I was totally disappointed in eHarmony. At least you got two dates out of the deal--I got none! I had better luck with a free dating site--it didn't lead to happily ever after, but I did get an awesome daughter out of the deal, so I'd hesitate to call it a total wash.
MsFahrenheit
#9. MsFahrenheit on 07/28/2009 - 2:59 am (EDT)
Yeah. eHarmony's FRUSTRATING!

 


Betty Boutique