Week in Review

Octomom on Jon and Kate, Miley Cyrus, Naked Women, and More

Mean Betty looks at the week in review

-Mean Betty

Miley Cyrus, Cash Cow

Hmmmm ... Miley Cyrus' expiration date must be nearing, as the feeding frenzy seems to be growing more and more ... frenzied. The latest scheme to milk money from this little golden calf before her first crow's foot appears: Why, Miley Cyrus, "designer" of course! And what better partner to the Miley Cyrus brand than good old Wal-Mart. The brilliant minds behind the Mega Mass All American chain is pairing Miley with silver-haired Max Azria - who obviously knows a good thing when he sees it.

Match made in heaven! Celebrated, respected designer of Hervé Léger, BCBG and Max Azria fame and ... ‘tween idol! Someone call Anna Wintour, quick!

The Octomom^TM Calls the Kettle Black

Ha! Forgive, pets, [insert hysterical laughter here] Mean Betty can barely type with tears of laughter running down her perfectly made-up face. Mean Betty just read the funniest thing right here on Betty ... Nadya Suleman, our dearest, darlingest Octomom^TM, has some choice words of reproach for none other than the very people who inspired her own brilliant meal-ticket scheme: Jon and Kate! Oh, too rich!

Nadya appeared with one or other of her babies (do you think she can tell them all apart?) to simultaneously CONFIRM that she had "signed something" for her own show (juicy details coming forthwith, Mean Betty is certain) ... and to deem Jon and Kate "exploitative." Well, dearie, you certainly have a point there. But what's that little saying about glass houses? (Ohh - a glass house! That's just what Nadya AND Jon and Kate should get - so much easier to air their dirty laundry and take advantage of their innocent children that way! Someone make a note.)

What's that? Oh! Octomom^TM's show is going to be HIGH ART ... a real "documentary" ... none of this invasive, exploitative "reality" stuff. Oh, OK, Mean Betty gets it. A thousand apologies!

[Insert more hysterical laughter here]

When In Doubt - Bring Out the Naked Women

Who says the publishing industry is in jeopardy? Those crafty media moguls know how to stay relevant and sell magazines!

Rolling Stone kills two birds with one stone: Both managing to get around the fact that "green" is the OLD black (or haven't you heard? Cheap is the new eco) and boost sales with their nude "Eco Warrier." Because nothing says save-the-earth like a naked, airbrushed starlet chained to a tree!

And Esquire puts the excitement back in reading (hey kids!) with Bar Rafaeli "wearing" only scrawled excerpts from a Stephen King story.

Life is Full of Little ... Surprises

Everyone's buzzing about Edie Falco's new show, Nurse Jackie. Mean Betty is sure it will be a veritable tour-de-force, but Mean Betty has to admit ... the first time Mean Betty saw a giant promo poster for the show, Mean Betty's exact thought was: "Is that Edie Falco playing a male nurse?"

Hmm ... Mean Betty might sleep with the fishes, but one does wonder if one of Tony's made men would have preferred her that way ...

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