Have you heard the news, kittens? Celibacy is the new black! Yes darlings, “no sex’ is the new “sex” for celeb ladies! (The men seem to be happy with “cheating with as many women as possible” is the new sex. Go figure!)

Read Mean Betty on Michelle McGee's "Apology" to Sandra Bullock

To start, we have darling little Ashley Dupre, who at last ia a “cover girl.” She graces the current issue of Playboy magazine and inside, without apparently a hint of irony, tells us, “I love sex and I’m very good at it, but I’m saving that.”

Saving?

Dearest, it’s a bit late for that, non?

And just for whom might she be “saving” it? Not, as one might assume, the highest bidder, but in fact her future boyfriend. Well, bless his heart.

“That’s for my future boyfriend from now on,” she says. “And it will be fabulous.”

So, to reiterate – Ashley is currently not putting out, but she doesn’t want us to forget her main talent in life. Got it.

In the meantime, of course, Ashley tells us she’s “not proud” of her career as a call girl – but that doesn’t seem to be stopping her from milking it for all it’s worth.

Mean Betty’s main concern with the timing of this cover is Mean Betty fears it will give inspiration to Michelle “Bombshell” McGee to continue her grasp at fame. We must not encourage her!