Atta girl! Enough of letting Levi Johnston hog the spotlight! Why should he have all the fun, right Bristol? Time to start milking your position in the Palin family and thinking about your career path! Yes, darlings, Sarah Palin’s daughter and the country’s most famous un-wed teenage mother is set to appear as herself on ABC Family's The Secret Life of the American Teenager.

“I am thrilled to be on this show and to be part of a program that educates teens and young adults about the consequences of teen pregnancy,” says young Bristol.

One might think that the baby in her arms and the ex-boyfriend/baby daddy on the cover of Playgirl might serve as enough of a cautionary tale, but kids these days – so hard to reach!

Read Mean Betty on Sarah Palin’s Hand Notes

Secret Life executive producer Brenda Hampton is also “thrilled,” stating: “We're thrilled to have [Bristol] join us, and I think she will bring additional attention to the issues facing teen parents that we've been exploring for a couple seasons now.”

Additional attention is right! Can you say ratings boost?

Well it’s about time, that’s all Mean Betty has to say. Bristol can appear on Oprah and write comments on her mom’s Facebook page only so many times – it’s high time she began milking the Palin fame machine to her own end. Milk baby, milk!

Mean Betty wonders, however, how mama bear Sarah Palin really feels about her daughter’s exposure to the dangers of Hollywood. Sure, Bristol’s playing herself, and it is a cautionary tale against teen sex, but still. It’s a slippery slope … the pull of the Dark Side is strong! After all, we all know the fine line between the East Coast Fox network (Sarah Palin’s new home) and the dreaded “Hollywood Fox” – the spawning-place of the infamous Family Guy episode.

Bristol better watch out – playing herself as a “cautionary tale” could be some sort of gateway drug to appearing in the middle of the next Gossip Girl sex scandal! This of course, would be even more sensational than the usual public fall from grace, as Bristol has vowed to abstain from having sex (again) until she gets married. And you know how those sneaky, persuasive Hollywood types love a good scandal!

Milk it, baby … but beware, sweet little Bristol. Every step closer you take to the dreaded Entertainment Industry of Doom, the harder it is to keep the moral high ground. And isn’t it so much fun to be able to look down at Levi?

xo,

Mean Betty