A Lament Over Brad Pitt’s Lost Good Looks
The Sexiest Man Alive is looking anything but these days and our resident poet has a theory about it.
-Betty’s Poet Laureate
Pardon us, Brad, or rather, Mr. Angelina Jolie,
We noticed your sex appeal has been absentee.
We fell for the cowboy hitchhiker in Thelma & Louise,
In that nude scene with Geena you did aim to please.
You became a star, went on to be a true symbol of sex,
In Troy you ran around bare-chested, showing off pecs.
But alas, that was way back when you were top stud,
When Angie wore around her neck Billy Bob’s blood.
We get that six kids keep you busy all day and all night,
But no time for a quick shave? That just doesn’t seem right.
Also, we do not approve of your recent awards coif,
Are you using too much product? Something is off.