5 Biggest First-Time Sex Mistakes

Having sex with a new partner can be stressful. Follow these tips to have fun and ensure that your first time together won’t be your last!

-Amber Madison

The first time you sleep with a new guy, there can be a lot riding on it. Sex introduces a new intimacy and vulnerability to a relationship, or at the very least, it changes it. That first time, you’re giving him a preview of what’s to come. To make sure you don’t rub him the wrong way, here are the five mistakes to avoid making the first time you sleep with him.

1. Going totally porn star. Obviously you want to wow him, but you also want to leave some things to his imagination. When you first have sex, chances are you don’t know him well enough yet to introduce your kinky fetishes, your power porn positions, your bizarre outfits, your role-playing ideas, or your willingness to touch him in places he might not have been touched before. With time, you can introduce all those things and more, but for now, think baby steps. Focus on working out the mechanics first and get to know each other’s sexual likes and dislikes. Just like you wouldn’t reveal the depths of your soul on a first date, don’t reveal all of your moves the first time around. It’s just too soon.

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2. Doing it unprotected. Same idea as the mistake #1: The first time you sleep with a guy you probably know very little about his sex habits. Depending on your relationship, you may not even know if you’re exclusive yet, if he’s ever had an STD or if he has reason to suspect he might. Having unprotected sex the first time you sleep with him is always a mistake. If the relationship progresses, you really trust him, and you think it’s really worth it, then you can decide to use other methods of protection (e.g., just birth control pills). But the first time you have sex, even if you’re using an IUD or hormonal contraception, always, always, always use a condom.