Breakups are painful, and most people will do just about anything to avoid feeling that pain. There are plenty of ways to do this. Alcohol. Impulse booking a trip around the world. Adopting a child. None of these apply to you? Well, you might just be avoiding the pain of your breakup in these less drastic—but still just as harmful—ways. Harmful because they are prolonging the inevitable.

Read Is Your Man Cheating?

On The Market Too Soon

Yes, it was a bad match. He treated you poorly. There was no chemistry. He was married…whatever the reason, he’s out of your life and that is a good thing. But this rationale doesn’t change the fact that you are used to devoting X amount of headspace to him. It’s so tempting to fill that space up with someone new and now. I have tried this. And I would actually meet great guys and go on perfectly enjoyable dates, only to find myself tossing and turning later that night, thinking about my ex more than ever. That was SO not the idea! Why does this happen?