Just the Facts, Betty

The Male ‘Stigma' of Flextime

Why men need to accept their time off

-Suzanne Robitaille

The good news: Younger, educated women are helping to foster flexible workplaces. The bad news: Younger, educated men aren't following in their footsteps.

Change begins at the top, and companies with more women in top positions are more likely to offer flexible workplaces. Today's youngest career women are juggling family and jobs, and they're more up-front about creating balance in their lives. In the 1980s, women didn't dream of mentioning the idea of cutting back on work. In the 1990s, maybe you would whisper about it. In this decade, women ask directly about work-life balance before accepting a job.

While women have made it clear that flextime will help keep them loyal to their job, the flexible-workplace trend hasn't made as much traction as it could. Yes, there is the federal Family and Medical Leave Act, which allows anyone to take time off when needed for family matters. But other than Australia, the United States is the only industrialized nation in the world that doesn't have paid family leave.

I firmly believe that we could alleviate at least part of this problem if today's young, educated men weren't so still tight-lipped about asking for time off. "It carries a stigma," says Joe Saft, who works at a public-relations company in New York.

Male workers tend to get a macho-like rush when they put in 60-plus hours a week at the office - not because they have to but because so many men are such incorrigibly high achievers. Some men are so anti-flex that they've come to resent the women who have generally benefitted from it.

"I am often left picking up the slack for my coworkers who are moms," said one disgruntled employee at a financial-services firm, who declined to be identified because he fears backlash from the women in his office.

Some employers are trying to wipe out the stigma of flextime as a women's issue by giving it a new face. They're offering sabbaticals, alternative career paths and, in some cases, paying to help set up home offices - all of which have a less bruising effect on the male ego.

Men - if time off is being offered (whatever they call it), please ask for it. You'll help restore the imbalance that exists in the workplace and might even find a little time for yourself in the process.